Green Damp-proofing

I’m afraid that Dry Rot is on holiday – this is Doctor Hindlefokker.

As a convicted chemical damp-proofer, I search for redemption.  After all, I’ve specified many, many hundreds of chemical DPC’s and even though I thought each and every one was needed, I stand condemned. There are 20 year insurance backed guarantees in my store; in the dark, thousands of them – forgive me.

Part of my rehabilitation is this blog, where I seek to explain the reasons for this serial offending and attempt to make some sense of my criminal world.

Today I turn to none-chemical damp-proofing; the thinking architects crack cocaine.

This movie illustrates the sort of damp proofing work I could have been involved with, if only I’d known that it existed, or if SPAB or RICS or RIBA could have got to me in time; with counselling.

It involves installation of magical ventilation pots, which even in our British maritime weather environment, will suck any rising damp from a wall – forever.

As can be seen in the movie; shot at great personel risk, in Leeds, you can put them in old walls and new ones, cavity or solid walls, wet or dry walls, under or above timber floors, up to four feet above the ground in 110mm thick brick walls if you fancy, anywhere in fact.  This is true damp-proofing nirvana.

Maybe if I had not been seduced by the dark side, I too could have used this damp proofing method, on all those houses I chemically sodomised – perhaps I’d be  canonised, not ostracised?

Anyway….be enlightened….

If you can help me make any sense at all of the footage you just witnessed please get in touch.  I’m really confused …….

Doctor Hindlefokker

Comments

  1. RobSG says:

    I have a few ideas.

    This virtual postcode will have to do.

    1) My first guess is that it is at the same or similar level to next doors DPC so in keeping!!!!

    2) I also guess that because it is ‘so in your face’ that they wanted to make it aesthetically pleasing and give the building a bit of horizontality. Just think how unsightly it would be if they had to step it down!!!

    3) Alternatively the floor in the house could be raised to increase ventilation!!!!

    4) The floor could have been raised so the kids could look out of the window.

    5) Something to step on so they could clean the gutters!!!!

    6) To stop people from leaning against the wall. You know how much of a problem that is!!!!

  2. Eric Grafton says:

    I’m really not surprised that Doctor Hindlefokker thinks this is damp proofing nirvana. Holland Damp Proofing have been fitting their air-flow system since 2000. And, yes, you can fit it almost anywhere: they’ve installed their system in a listed building, a windmill and a castle as well as in thousands of homes across Britain. You don’t have to chemically inject a property to get rid of damp any more. This is the age of enlightenment – Holland style.

  3. yes Eric, you are correct. My own eyes have seen it – in almost any situation, it can be installed. in the castles, big unt little buildings, anywhere where there is any kind of damp. I have it on the best authority that it is the MASTER cure for rising damp, condensation unt penetrating damp too – no need to check if there really is a problem- just sell it to the peeps who think they need it (those green peeps like it very much), – install anyway. That way there can be no possibility of any damp at all – ever.

    Don’t mention the silly salts in the plasterverk, if we do, the peeps may not place an order.

    I think I will have this for my sweaty armpits – the master cure…..

    Eric? We are going to be rich!

    Can you give me a quote?…cash waiting (euros okay?).

  4. I am looking for a new way of treating rising damp myself, but what I dont understand is how you treat the party walls with these vented systems. and how do I get rid of the salts that accumalate in the plaster without replastering?

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Copyright © 2010 Preservation Expert. Legal Stuff: All the advice and information in the posts on my blog is made in good faith and is based on my experience and knowledge at the time of writing. However, nobody is infallible and whilst I’m confident that most of what I write about preservation issues is accurate, there’s a good chance there’ll be an error or two somewhere. I do change my mind about stuff, as I gain more experience. In view of this you must make your own decisions on whether to follow any advice I write and think about this; I could be wrong. No responsibility will be accepted by the author for any losses anyone may suffer as a result of any mistake or for the consequence of any action you take as a result of reading this blog. If you do suffer a loss, resulting from anything I’ve written, a verbal heartfelt apology will be your only compensation.